I often notice common themes among my clients over the course of the week. This week, besides guilt over Halloween candy consumption, I have heard both panic and shame over not being productive enough. There are only two months left! The holidays are around the corner! I should be doing more! Where does that “should” come from? Who says so? How is that judgmental voice of your inner critic serving you? What do you even mean by “productive”? By whose standards?

Last month I got to catch up on a lot of reading, both fiction and nonfiction. I finally got around to reading Circe, by Madeline Miller. Set during the Greek Heroic Age, it is an adaptation of various Greek myths, most notably the Odyssey, as told from the perspective of the immortal witch Circe. In case you didn’t notice, our society seems to be obsessed with the idea of immortality too, as we seek eternal youth. But we are human and we are mortal. Fortunately, with wrinkles comes wisdom, and with wisdom comes gratitude. We can be grateful for every moment that we do have on this Earth.

We, Turbo Thinkers, have a love / hate relationship with change. On the one hand, we love it! It’s something new! It’s bright and shiny! It gives me hits of dopamine! Yay! Give me anything to break the boredom! Let’s shake things up a bit! Woohoo!

A friend recently asked me for advice on how to balance social activities while still staying productive. I paused and told her that I did not have a one size fits all solution. Now that we are past the lockdowns of winter, summertime brings a desire to get outside & socialize more with an abundance of novel activities to bedazzle and stimulate Turbo Thinkers.

I just had a client that raised such a great question: How do I know when I am honoring my needs or avoiding something? She had been allowing herself to sleep and rest at home a lot, but was also feeling a bit guilty about it. As the coaching conversation flowed, she decided to write two columns with the headings: Avoidance and Active Rest.

In one of my Turbo Think Tanks today, a client realized that she wanted to keep track of what she HAD accomplished, rather than beating herself up for what she had not done. By shifting to a celebration of positive progress forward, she could focus on her strengths and her secret sauce. She could build a bank of evidence, proving to her inner critic that, “Yes! I can get things done!” We call this a Ta-da list, and I find that it is just as important or even more important than a To-do list.

One of my dearest friends came over for a porch visit last night. We shared freshly picked Japanese plums and a glass of wine as we caught up, she on my swing and me in a rocker, listening to the wind chimes and palms swishing in the breeze. She reminded me that we hadn’t seen each other since Mardi Gras, and so much had happened: overnight canoe camping, beach volleyball, trail biking, blues concerts at the square, and more.

As Turbo Thinkers, we sometimes have trouble regulating our emotions. We feel things really intensely! How can we be aware of our emotions in our bodies? How can we use that information? How can we calm down our nervous system to regulate our emotions? When we have the ability to regulate our emotions, we can activate our executive function skills. For example, we can move out of the paralyzing state of overwhelm towards task initiation.

I just returned from a stunning trip to Costa Rica, where I had the opportunity to stay in a tiny cabin at the base of a volcano. My trip overflowed with the simple pleasures of immersing myself in nature, eating simple, whole foods, feeling love and living la pura vida. I could be fully present and mindful while appreciating every moment with eternal gratitude.

It was a tough decision for me, but at the last minute I had to cancel all of my appointments the week after Hurricane Ida hit. I evacuated, my family and friends were displaced, and I did not know the state of my home or how the city of New Orleans would recover, if ever. Flashbacks of Hurricane Katrina returned, along with the shock, sadness and anxiety of the unknown.

There are times when I catch myself in a tailspin of insecurity. I sink to a pool of self doubt and shame. I feel so inadequate and incompetent. The spinning seems to never end, engulfing me deeper into a dark hole of misery, like I am being sucked down the garbage disposal of the kitchen sink that is my brain. I need to grab hold of something to get me out of my own head because I know that only I am in control of my own thoughts. I engage in personal inquiry: What is my reality?

After years of shame and self doubt, many Turbo Thinkers have developed a fixed mindset. This can take the form of negative self talk and absolutes such as, “I’m just lazy,” “I never finish what I start,” or “I am an anxious person.” These limiting belief systems prevent us from trying anything new.

A few Mondays ago, my AC gave out. We had typical New Orleans, subtropical weather during those days: highs in the upper 90’s, lows in the upper 80’s. Sunny skies with a daily afternoon thundershower and high humidity 24/7. Great for a dewy complexion but fierce for focused work. My house has a geothermal system, which only a limited few technicians in my area are qualified to service. I was placed on a waiting list and told to standby. Days passed.

As Turbo Thinkers, our minds tend to race like the wind, like Category 5 hurricane winds. How can we put our brains in the eye of the storm, where peace, calm and quiet reside? How can we let the storm pass, taking all of the debris with it and leaving us with our most important thoughts intact?Mindfulness is the ability to pay attention to the present moment with kindness and curiosity. It involves pressing the pause button to thoughts racing into the past or into the future.

Many of my clients often experience a sense of being overwhelmed, sometimes daily, when they begin the coaching process. They may feel like they are juggling too many objects. They feel like someone is constantly throwing more things at them to keep in the air. And maybe some of those objects are water balloons, raw eggs or newborn babies.

Mornings have been chilly in New Orleans this week...well, by subtropical standards. And with sunrise so late, it’s still dark when my alarm goes off. Knowing that my friends will be waiting for me at the corner inspires me to get out of bed, put my running clothes on, grab the leash and go. My dog, of course, sees no challenge whatsoever in this scenario

There are so many things for which to be grateful this year. Call me Pollyanna, but I am addicted to my attitude of gratitude. How can you begin to list the positive things in your life? For example, I am grateful for my sun-filled home, for my son’s sense of humor, for my daughter’s sense of responsibility, for my cat’s purrs, for my dog’s unconditional love, for my good health, etc.

How do you want to feel? In many initial consults, clients begin to list all of their shortcomings, negative traits, challenges and inabilities. They often begin to list all of the major tasks they have failed to complete, or even begin. They wallow in how awful they feel, stuck in a spiral of shame and overwhelm.

What types of affirmations do work for Turbo thinkers? In my experience, the ones that work best are the ones that you make up yourself. Through a process of self discovery, you become reacquainted with your most authentic self.

How do you turn around a negative belief system? Who would you be without those negative thoughts? What would be possible? No one is thinking those thoughts but you. What are the facts? What is the reality? How can you bring your thoughts back to the present moment and align your mind with your body?